“The first rule that a geisha is taught… Is to be charming to other women. Every girl in the world should have geisha training”.
Diana Vreeland
I travel because I want to experience and immerse myself in other cultures — its language, dress, customs, art forms and unique national quirks. I seek out natives to ask questions about their daily lives, world views, work and favorite pastimes. Japan offered a smorgasbord of opportunities and experiences on all topics.
In Kyoto I had several exceptional and extraordinary experiences. One standout was the opportunity to meet a geisha and spend an afternoon and dinner with her one-on-one.
We met in front of an Italian bar and restaurant that I was surprised to learn she owned. As we strolled through her quiet neighborhood (not the overrun tourist area of Gion), I discovered many surprising aspects to her and insights into her life.
Umaiha-san(pronounced: ooh-may-ha-san The suffix “san” is a Japanese honorific appended to first names) proved to be an impressive young woman who was willing to share her personal life as well as reveal many aspects of the geisha world.
Initially her father disapproved of her desire to become a geisha and insisted she go to university, which she did earning a degree in psychology before realizing her own lifetime dream of entering the geisha life (he is now extremely proud of her)! Not surprisingly, she excelled at her training in tea ceremony, dance, music, singing, conversation and games. When I asked about her ability to speak English she explained that because geishas have had to adapt to a modern and international clientele, it is advantageous to know another language. In her case she speaks both English and Italian – in addition to all her other skills!
Though curious, I did not pry into her personal life but she volunteered some fascinating information. Geisha are required to be single. They are free to marry but then can no longer be geisha. However, if they later divorce, they can return to their former geisha status. Even more surprising to me is they can conceive and bear a child and remain geisha as long as they do not marry! In just the recent past geishas did not have or use modern technology such as cell phones and social media but, in an effort to stay current and adapt, it is now allowed and not unusual for new apprentices to use this technology to stay more connected to family and friends.
An apprentice is called a “maiko.” To become a maiko they must first pass an evaluation to determine their future success as a geisha by the “mother” of the communal home (called “okiya”) they will live in for the duration of their training. The mother, a kind of sponsor, pays for their training and other expenses until they become geisha. Upon achieving geisha status, they must then pay back the mother. Umaiha-san pointed out her own okiya house and told me there is currently only one maiko residing there, an indication of the difficulty to appeal to the younger generation. Umaiha-sans own desire to become a geisha is rooted in a deep respect for the unique traditions of Japan and the high level of skills required to attain such status.
Her historic neighborhood has a mix of homes and shops in traditional architecture. Neighbors politely greeted her and we were welcomed into her favorite accessory and sweet shops. We eventually came to the end of the street and crossed a main thoroughfare and entered the gorgeous, serene grounds of a Buddhist retreat and temple. The fluttering and twittering of birds could be heard as they flew between large groves of plum and cherry trees. Huge stone lanterns lined pathways between temples and shrines.
Most geishas will not interact with tourists as they are very private and protective of their lives. Indeed, tourist harassment has become so overtly invasive and even physical, it is now illegal to touch a geisha or even take a picture without permission in the Gion area. Though I did not ask, Umaiha-San volunteered to have her picture taken and she posed in the red Torii gates on the grounds. The temperature was in the high eighties and I wondered aloud about her “casual” fall kimono.
She explained that geisha dress is strictly codified. Regardless of climate conditions, seasons are dictated by the dates on the calendar and require specific seasonal kimono dress. The seasons are further divided into weeks and even single festival days, with their own symbolic kimonos stipulated. Umaiha-san laughed when I asked how many kimonos she owns saying, “you can’t have too many. I have about 70 now.” Colors and motifs determine the appropriateness of the kimono and some are worn only once a year for a festival or celebration. (Below is a photo of Umaiha-san performing – for which she is paid- in such a celebration).
Kimonos can cost in the thousands of dollars (and there are all the accessories and extra accoutrements, as well). Geisha is an art form and lifestyle but it is also an individual small business that must be carefully managed.
Geishas have a great deal of autonomy in their lives in spite of what may seem to be a restrictive lifestyle. They are free to marry or have children, they can own businesses, they can choose their clients and are free explore personal interests and travel. Many choose to work within a closed and safe referral system keeping away from individual client interaction. Umaiha-san is unusual in this respect.She told me she loves to meet people from all over the world, but she is free to be discerning in her choices – it is she who decides who to accept as a client. She is a forward thinking and thoroughly modern woman in this respect.
This was truly a Purely Personal experience I shall always treasure — and there was more to come. We were to meet for a classic geisha dinner that evening. I could hardly wait to see this extraordinary woman in the fullness of her professional capacity.
